Relationship Extra: 9 Tips to Help You Create the Best Relationship Ever!

November 24, 2018 9News Nigeria Family & Relationships, Relationship Extra 0

We may well have cracked the code of love, or at least most of us may have done, but love is only part of a relationship and the experience of love can be fleeting.

To keep hold of love and to really experience all of its faces, we need to find the formula to create the best relationship ever.  This way we can keep love on our side for the longest time.

Here are 9 tips to help you create the best relationship ever!

1. Acknowledge that relationships don’t just work because you love each other

Sometimes, we might naively think that just because we love and are committed to each other, that is all you need to create the best relationship. But while those qualities are immensely important, they are not the secret to attaining the best relationship.

You can still love each other and remain committed but not take care of your own issues, or take your relationship for granted.  You can still love and commit to each other but not take quality time out with each other, or remember to maintain intimacy. You can still love each other and be separated!

The best relationship ever can only happen when both partners are fully committed to cherishing each other, and their relationship through all aspects of life.

Love isn’t a such a  magical thing that comes and goes without your control, you can easily learn to love and bond with somebody.  Which means that you can also choose to remain in love with somebody.

There’s really no excuse for allowing the love to dry up in a relationship, you just need to make sure that you constantly commit yourself to work on your relationship. That’s how you can create the best relationship ever.

2. Every day, try to be vulnerable, gentle and kind

It’s ok to lower your defences at home, and within your relationship, it’s how you will connect and build trust, but sometimes everyday life takes over and causes us to have to put a front on so that we can navigate the world.

Making an effort to lower that front that you put on daily in front of your partner so that you can show gentleness, and kindness to your partner is a sure fire way to create the best relationship ever.  

3. Show each other openly that you want affection by openly reaching out

This should be another daily practice; asking your partner for affection or attention is not only a way to exercise your self-expression but also to let your partner know, just how much you need them.  Plus it keeps intimacy alive.

These are such great rewards for one daily action don’t you think?  Which is why this strategy makes it to our list of the greatest ideas to create the best relationship ever!

4. Be strong for each other

Sometimes it’s easy to dismiss something that is important to your partner because it’s not important to you. Perhaps your partner has an emotional reaction to something might seem unnecessary to you, but it’s very real to your partner.

Maybe you or your partner needs a little time on their own now and again but you don’t relate.

Trying to understand why your partner might need things that you don’t relate to and then respecting them (and vice versa) can avoid plenty of arguments and contribute to the best relationship ever.  

5. Reach out at times of anxiety or worry

The next time you feel uncertain, worried or anxious, try just mentioning this to your partner and taking their hand, or noticing their emotional signals and reaching for their hand.  

This will promote a supportive response between you as a couple, which will help you to feel held emotionally and the act of hand-holding is also known to be calming.

6. Keep yourself in check

Sometimes it can be difficult to be open, instead, most people might choose to be defensive, critical, aloof, distant or even shut down.

It’s these times that can cause problems in a relationship and can create a distance.

If you both commit to check yourselves and work through why you might feel that way with your partner – so that you can change your actions to an open response, your relationship will soar on a fast-track to the best relationship ever.  

7. Make it a practice in your relationship to reflect on how you and your partner interact

Talking about how your week went on a weekly basis so that you can review and amend behaviours, and pattern as well as acknowledge the good times, will keep your relationship on point!

Topics you could discuss are;

When you felt like you were reaching out to your partner but didn’t feel like they were listening.  How you responded when your partner was distressed. What you laughed about together. Or even what would have had to happen to make your relationship awesome this week?

Make sure you tailor the questions to suit your relationship but don’t avoid topics that are necessary for creating the best relationship ever.  

8. Acknowledge all of the things you love and appreciate about each other

Celebrate the little wins in your relationship, they will make you both feel loved and appreciated.  

Acknowledge what your partner did to make you feel loved, happy, joyful, and supported and make sure you tell them, at least once per week so that they can feel appreciated and keep it up.

9. Tone down the arguments

Underneath an argument is often a request from your partner for more emotional connection and more support.  But when things get heated, it’s difficult to see this, especially when we are feeling defensive.

If you are not careful about what words you use or how you talk to your partner at these times can be the difference between a rocky relationship and the best relationship ever.  

Try to look at the situation as if you were on the outside looking in and ask yourself what the root of the problem here is and how can it be resolved.  Then acknowledge the problem and work on that, make a pact that you’ll both do this, and everything will be sweet!.

-Marriage

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