Arguments, trust issues, and misunderstandings are part of the many bumps a relationship has to go through. With a number of these problems coming unannounced and at an alarming rate, it’s a sad fact that most relationships don’t prosper. It may sound pessimistic but that’s the reality that both men and women face.
For those who stay positive, the bond that two partners share becomes one. Everything becomes one. Success and failure, victory or defeat both of them have to go through it together. Truthfully, problems will appear non-stop. The reality of this situation is that this will eventually cause strain with one or even the both partners.
The important matter here is how couples keep the romance alive and continue being intimate even after multitudes of problems and arguments they experience along the way. Being married for quite awhile, here are some tips that my husband and I would like to share with you to small things that a couple can do and should avoid for them to make their relationship stronger.
1. Competition
We always have friendly competitions between ourselves. One competition we have is that we like arranging our separate rooms. My husband particularly likes personalizing his bedroom. He likes to add in a lot of pillows and comfortable blankets. His room also doubles as our mini cinema where we can chill and watch movies together.
My bedroom, on the other hand, leans more on the feminine side. My bed is a king-sized mattress that has a single large comforter that keeps us cozy every time we crank up the air conditioning. The winner of this competition solely depends on us, and sometimes he wins, sometimes I win.
Little events and competitions like these keep us both interested as we tend to be very creative when it comes to personalization.
2. Do something fun
Once in awhile, do something fun with your partner. If both of you have decided that you don’t want to have kids at this time, then it’s more reason to enjoy each other’s company even more. Plan activities like going to the beach or spending a night together in some resort.
If you do have kids, then plan something more detailed in advanced. Opt to leave your children with relatives if they’re old enough. With that, both of you can safely go on with your trips without any worries.
3. Never go to sleep with a problem
Although it may seem impossible, my husband and I always make it a point to talk about our problems before going to sleep. We don’t allow our problems to go with us in our sleep because we don’t want to wake up with a heavy heart.
If it’s small and petty arguments, we always make it a point that we solve it before sleeping together in bed. If it’s a big problem, we don’t sleep until we come up with something to settle a disagreement.
4. Don’t Backread
Another difficult task that we try a lot often is to never “backread” when having arguments. In case you’re wondering, we came up with the term “backread” when one of us tries to remember past mistakes we did to each other. Remembering such painful experiences do not help the current situation as it could make it worse instead.
Arguably, not doing a backread is quite difficult. We try as much as possible not to bring up any past events that may end up hurting us more.
5. Never give up
Whenever someone’s feeling down between the two of us, we never stop consoling each other. We don’t stop until we don’t find out what’s bothering us. If all else fails, a simple hug usually does the trick, and we end up talking about the problem.
Takeaway
If anything is in agreement, it’s the fact that there isn’t a perfect marriage that exists anywhere in this world. Problems and arguments are the inevitable realities of being married to someone you love. Love isn’t all about rainbows and sugar-coated moments; it’s about getting together through all the hardships that life has to offer.
