Finding your purpose, and then creating a regret-filled life with your partner can feel daunting. But the payoff is a remarkable life led by a profound sense of clear direction and meaning. We all want to know three things: That we have a reason for being here; That our life has meaning; That we matter enough to leave an impactful legacy.
When we forget these truths, we can fall into the rabbit hole of “finding” our purpose to the point that it stresses us out. When we’re stressed out, we are certainly not living a regret-free life.
Discovering your purpose is directly tied to creating a life full of joy, incredible experiences, and connections, rather than regrets, worries, and fears.
When in a marriage or partnership, aligning to our purpose becomes imperative in order to establish a clear direction of where we’re growing together.
It gives our partners insight into how they can support our big dreams, our need for meaning, and help us have an impact in the world.
The key is to gain clarity and also see how diverse and expansive living a life of purpose (and without regrets) can be for married couples.
Here are ten simple, yet profound, ways to discover your purpose and begin creating your regret-free life and marriage.
- Flip through magazines for images and words that speak to you. This can help you identify your passions and what’s important to you.
- Identify leaders you admire. Write out how you admire and what qualities you’d like to instill in your life.
- Look for people in your life who you feel are living on purpose. See if you can get them to share insights with you and/or your partner such as: when and how did you discover your purpose? What are their top 3 tips to living a life of purpose? What is their greatest regret? How are they consciously structuring their life to avoid regrets in the future?
- Be purposeful about everything that you do. How we do the little ‘things’ determines how we do the big things in life. So, if you want to thrive in your purpose-filled life, you’ll feel better about starting somewhere. The added benefit in a marriage is that you partner also reaps the benefits of this mentality by being made a priority in everyday interactions.
- Clear out your unhealthy habits. All of the choices that we make directly impact our sense of purpose. Ask your partner to help you be accountable or to join you in this effort. Teamwork makes the dream work!
- Consider reading books on soul purpose, goal achievement, and mindfulness together as a couple. The key is to move those tips into implementation mode instead of bogged down in research mode. Keep each other curious, open-minded, and intrigued by growth.
- Start small, but purposefully. Remember: you can always take it at a pace that works for you!
- Meet people. It is definitely not part of our purpose to exist in isolation. We are here to connect and learn from each other. Encourage your partner to explore healthy independence in platonic relationships as well.
- Notice the ‘problems’ that you feel compelled to fix and the problems that people bring to you. There are clues in here about how you can make a difference in the world and create meaning and impact in your life. Oftentimes, if these passions align, it can be an excellent way for couples to share intentional time together.
- Make time for this. Make your purpose as an individual and a couple a priority. Honor that, and give yourself the sacred space to put your purpose on the agenda of life. Stay connected together, in fluid dialogue, about your thoughts and insights. There is nothing greater than supporting a partner who is on a mission to shine and reflect that light back to you.
A purpose-driven partnership offers a deep, enduring sense of companionship, comfort, and adventure. It nurtures our need to feel connected, physically and spiritually, to others and ourselves. By committing yourself to growth, you are sending a strong message that your partnership with your purpose and your partner matters.
VERIFIED EXPERT
Life Coach Jennifer Longmore, B.A.S.W., M.Ed, is the Founder of Soul Journeys, a coaching company that helps people rediscover their life’s purpose. Jennifer has conducted over 30,000 Soul Purpose Sessions, including ones with Fortune 500 executives at Microsoft, Amazon and Disney, as well as with professional athletes from the Chicago Bulls, the L.A. Lakers and the Seattle Sounders. Longmore is the author of many books on finding your soul purpose including “365 Wisdom Bombs”; “88 Universal Laws”; and others.
